Fried Brains, Nuts On The Side

I had my psychological testing yesturday. It was WAY more involved than I imagined. To be honest, it sucked. The first 40 minutes or so we talked, which I expected. But what I didn't expect was the rehashing of every bad memory I have ever had. My resolve for calm, cool and collected flew out the window. I found myself evaluating every word, every experience, I had and wondering, does this make me abnormal? And the why questions, well, I am not sure why, maybe I was young? stupid? idealistic? naive? Shortly after I began, I 'locked' up. Call it performance anxiety, stress, worry, whatever, but after that I just couldn't focus. I feel like it's Mindy's groundhog day, cycling all through a very, very bad marriage over and over again. The psychologist asked me if I was depressed. "I'm not depressed! I've been divorced for two years, and still going through this battle that should have ended shortly after. I just want to move on and live my life!" Who knew I was going to get the vocab, math and history quiz. The Rorshach, MMPI (500+ questions), oh yeah, and draw pictures...I left there feeling like I had been picked apart, fried and served with nuts. I was so tense, (I mean this is a recommendation for custody, my sons future!), that I could not think of the capital of Italy. DUH! It was all there...but the retrieval mechanism was behind the 'out of order' sign.

So what do I do? Post it on a blog. For the whole world to see. I'm sure I'm not the only one experiencing this situation, there has to be others out there with some empathy.

Three questions: "What would be your most important wish?" "That my kids find the best possible situation in which to develop, be secure and happy". "What are the best and worse things that have happened to you?" "My children are the best thing that has happened to me, the worst is my divorce and the break up of my family. I wanted my family." "What is the one value, or moral you feel is most important to instill in your children?" " Honesty, to be honest with themselves, honest about themselves, and honest with others."

*Sigh*
Bluenewt